So you’re sixteen and fancy standing out from the crowd. What do you do?
Well Lewis Flint decided he was going to tattoo Henry Hoover above his penis. For those outside the UK Henry The Hoover is a weirdly loved cultural phenomenon in the form of a hoover that has eyes and a nozzle for a nose (pictured above). He was cheap and ubiquitous during the eighties and such a staple of the UK household that he has become something of a kitschy retro product that’s all the rage.
If you’re having trouble imagining the logistics of the tattoo, Lewis Flint’s penis goes where the nozzle is.
However (and coming as a surprise to absolutely no one ever) Lewis Flint, now 21, has come to regret the tattoo.
“When I first got it done aged 16 I couldn’t stop getting it out, I got loads of attention and I was a bit of a local hero, I loved it,” he said describing his initial feelings.
“But I was with a girl recently and I liked her, things were going well until we got naked. When she saw it she said ‘what’s that? I am off!’ I was gutted, I never thought I would regret my tattoo when I got it done. When I think about that night the girl walked out it does haunt me and puts me off showing it to other women in the future. I know laser removal is painful but never getting laid again would be more painful.”
So there we have it, genitals and pop culture references don’t go together. Normally, at this stage you’d just have it removed. Err…
“The thought of that going round near my balls is unbearable. I don’t know how people put up with 20 minutes of it. Laser is too painful for me to get rid of this tattoo, I am going to have to put up with it,” Lewis Flint admitted in a follow-up interview, revealing that he’d tried to go through with the removal but failed.
At this stage we have to ask, how come the needle repeatedly stabbing your balls was okay but the laser wasn’t?
Ladies, would a Henry the Hoover tattoo put you off? Or would you just, uh, suck it up? Let us know in the comments below!