Police have confirmed in a report that on Sunday April 22nd they arrested Gregory Carney, aged 54, after he threw a Billy the Bass singing fish at his boyfriend’s head and left him bleeding. When police arrived having been called on a case of domestic battery at the scene they found Larry Timmerman, aged 52, sitting in his car outside in a state of distress.
He told police that he and his partner had argued, and this boyfriend had given him the injury which was a laceration close to his hairline.
It was revealed the two men had been arguing throughout the previous day, frequently coming into conflict only to then walk away from each other. At one point Gregory entered the living room and began playing with the Billy the Bass fish to annoy his partner, Larry. He did this for quite some time, and when he left the room Larry took the opportunity to throw the fish in the trash.
When Gregory returned he noticed the fish was missing and asked Larry about it. Larry told him the fish was in a trash can outside. Gregory grabbed the fish and was so angry that he threw it at Larry, leaving him inured and bleeding.
It was because of this that police were called to the scene and Gregory was arrested without incident. However, Carney has insisted that he did not mean to throw the fish at his partner and was not actually aiming for him when he threw it.
Billy the Bass singing fishes are novelty toys that saw a huge upsurge in popularity during the nineties and early noughties, largely because of their kitschy appearance and their dad-joke sensibility.
They often sang popular songs like Rock Lobster, Don’t Worry, and others, and have the remarkable distinction of being the most irritating thing to ever come out of the nineties.
Despite this, there’s been no update on whether Greg and Larry have gotten back together, which is a shame since they were together for 17 years. And that’s a relationship that’s been going on too long for it all to be ended by an airborne singing novelty.
That’d be a strange plaice to end it.